If youre going to bury the truth, make sure it stays buried
Rating: 5/10
Running Time: 100 minutes
UK Certificate: 15
On DVD
The fisherman look is a peculiar choice for a slasher flick baddie, given the fact that its not remotely scary. I cant recall ever leaping behind the sofa in terror when Captain Birdseye appeared on the screen to plug his latest range of crispy cod crumb. In fact, Fishermans Friends are much more horrifying than actual fishermen, as anyone whos ever tasted one will know.
Nevertheless, a haddock-catching madman is the choice of villain in this mildly entertaining but essentially stupid teen horror. It tells the tale of four equally witless protagonists the supposedly-sensible Julie (Jennifer Love Hewitt), empty-skulled beauty queen Helen (Sarah Michelle Gellar), mild-mannered hunk Ray (Freddie Prinze Jr.) and knuckle-brained quarter-back Barry (Ryan Phillipe).
One drunken July 4th, their car ploughs into a pedestrian and, all being far too pretty to even contemplate what might happen to them in prison, decide to dump the body in the sea and pretend nothing has happened. Of course, something HAS happened, and whats worse is that the local boat-dwelling psychopath appears to know all about it and hes not using that giant hook of his for catching tiddlers.
Remarkably, both I Know What You Did and the previous years Scream were penned by the same screenwriter, Kevin Williamson. That comes as a surprise predominantly because the best bits of Scream the humour, intelligence, and inventive use of shocks are all left out here in favour of a string of fairly bland clichés (in fact, largely the same clichés that Scream parodied so successfully).
Youll have a tough job caring about any of the characters here, the plot rarely attempts to even tweak with its well-worn formula, and the calibre of the acting can only be described as mediocre at best (with Phillipes cringe-tastic performance easily the worst of the lot). What it does have in its favour is that its fairly quickly-paced, and theres just about enough frantic-running-about-in-no-particular-direction to make it watchable. Just dont expect to be frightened by it.
It's Got: Crabs
It Needs: A set of ear-plugs for Love Hewitts repeated shrieking.
DVD Extras A trailer and some production notes. DVD Extras Rating: 1/10
Summary
Scream minus wit and originality.