It's a thin line between love and friendship.
Rating: 3/10
US Certificate: PG-13 UK Certificate: 12A
The romantic comedy motto is that ‘the course of love never runs straight’ and it could not be more true than in the borderline-terrible Something Borrowed.
Rachel (Goodwin) is an attorney at a big New York law firm and is also a lovely person apparently. Despite this, wonderful Rachel is unhappy and alone and is constantly reminded of this by engaged best-friend Darcy (Hudson) so she turns the tables and beds Dex (Colin), Darcy’s dreamy fiancé and Rachel’s crush since high school. Meanwhile, there’s also Ethan (Krasinski), Rachel’s confidante, who secretly wants her but is being pursued by love-struck Claire (Williams) and then there’s even a guy called Marcus (Howey) who turns up wanting a bit of Rachel. The pressure builds as the wedding approaches and everyone tries to figure out what to do. Forget love triangles, Something Borrowed is a film about love dodecahedrons.
There are plenty of intermittently funny jokes and witty one-liners in the movie so it’s not all bad but the characters remain paper-thin and it’s hard to see why we would root for any of them. Any characterisation that is attempted just serves to make everyone seem detestable. The film tries to make the actions that occur here seem like everyday events but they’re not – they’re merely bad people doing bad things. And this is coming from someone who once kicked a cat.
As a further assault to the senses, the film score is saccharine sweet and never gives a moment for quiet reflection as it constantly grates at the ear drums. Overall, at a nearly two hour runtime, Something Borrowed is more of a test of attrition than a light-hearted romantic comedy or a work of any substance. A standard Kate Hudson effort really.
It's Got: Some witty jokes, not the worst acting you will see, an interminable film score
It Needs: Characters you care about, less detestable actions, a shorter runtime
Summary
Something Borrowed is a film that took two hours of my life and I don’t think I will get them back. This is the romantic comedy equivalent of the Nuremburg Trials.